Respect can be a complicated mode if we look at it that way.  We learn all about respect (hopefully) from our parents and other adult figures during our childhood, like our teachers.  We can’t confuse ‘respect’ with ‘obedience’ – some kids might obey because they are afraid.  If they respect you, they will obey because they know you want what’s best for them.

Respect is a balancing act.  The best way to teach or earn respect is to show respect.  I’ve known a lot of people that have the ‘do as I say, don’t do as I do’ type personality – and their kids (and others in their life who are influenced by them) have mirrored their disrespect.  Another saying to remember is “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Respect is an attitude.

The best way to earn respect is to show respect.

Some simple ways to show respect are to be honest (if you do something wrong, admit it and apologize), be positive (don’t embarrass, insult or make fun of your kids or others – compliment them instead.  Or, as many of our mothers always said “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!), be polite (use “please” and “thank you” – it’s amazing how far those simple words will go!), be reliable (keep promises – show that you really mean what you say), and be considerate (think before you speak – something I always need to work on…my mouth moves faster than my brain does sometimes) and be a good listener.

Self-respect is one of the most important forms of respect. Once we respect ourselves, it is easier to respect others, who will in turn show respect towards you.  See?  Respect really is a balancing act!

How do you handle the balancing act?  If you have kids, what kinds of things do you do to teach them about respect?

This Respectful Spin Cycle was brought to you in part by Jen, who I have the greatest admiration and Respect for, and who is also Sprite’s Keeper.  Show a little respect and stop by and see how others view respect!  Please and Thank You.


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16 Comments

  1. You are so right. I remember adults telling me that I had to respect them merely because they were adults. Obviously, that doesn’t really work.

    Ethan is not yet 2, but I try to show him respect through offering choices, getting on his level to listen to him when he’s upset or just trying to talk to me, spending time reading and encouraging him to “read” or whatever. As he gets older, I’ll continue to look for ways to show him that I respect him and his ideas, even if I don’t always agree.
    Katherine would like you to read ..Watching what I sayMy Profile

  2. I think one of the greatest things you can teach your children & live out in your own healthy life–is drawing boundaries. In all ways–literal, emotional, physical etc… Whether it’s knocking on a closed door before you enter, saying “excuse me” before you interrupt, or just having an “off limits” area of the house. I’vc found SO many children (daycare director for a decade) that think NOTHING about going through mom’s purse, cabinets, getting in her things…..this was unthinkable for me as a child! It is indeed a balancing act for while children are indeed “people” — they are still children. I think we rather make them into “little adults” who then feel entitled to the same freedoms, choices, & privileges without learning that these things come with maturity and responsibility.
    Chantel would like you to read ..The HeartMy Profile

  3. It’s tough. I work with at-risk kids, and they all demand respect, will get into fights if they don’t get respect, but they have no idea how to show it.
    Kristina P. would like you to read ..Insert Witty Title HereMy Profile

  4. First and foremost I’ve tried to teach my kids to respect themselves – you’re right, you can’t give it to someone else if you can’t give it to yourself, nor can you expect it from others if you don’t respect yourself. It is a balancing act, indeed.
    Jan would like you to read ..Just A Little BitMy Profile

  5. Is the most wealth every human being should obtain to become useful not only to himself but to his family and society. the global problems at hand is caused due to the absent of respect especially amongst youth.

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