For some, Facebook is like an addiction.  Some people spend hours and hours on it, playing games, adding status updates, generally enjoying the time suck it can be.  I’m not a big Facebook playah, but I have been trying to find time to at least do more than take the easy way out of having my blog posts automatically updated with no effort from me required at all.  While I still haven’t embraced the whole status update mode, I have started clicking that handy dandy ‘like’ button on other people’s status, and tried to make time to wish people a happy birthday on their wall.  I’ll get there – probably not as rabid as some, but at least more interactive than I currently am.

Princess Nagger had two of her BFF’s come over the other day for a play date – loud, shrieking girls having fun running all over the house and backyard – you’d think there were more than just three of them.  It sounded like an army of 8 and 9 year olds.  And then the inevitable – the talk about Facebook, and how the other two girls have their own pages, but Princess Nagger did not.  About how much fun they have on Facebook, and what cool games there are to play, not to mention the chat mode.  Oh boy.

I had previously managed to dissuade Princess Nagger from even contemplating Facebook – after all, she’s too young.  There is a minimum age requirement, is there not?  So when she came with her pleading big puppy dog baby blues asking if she could Pretty Please have a Facebook page so she could interact with her BFF’s when they’re not together playing, I tried to pull the age card.  Didn’t work.  The other two girls bypassed that scenario by putting in a date that would allow them to join up – with their mother’s permission.  So I decided to defer to the hubby, let him be the ‘bad guy’ by saying that dreaded word, ‘No’.  Only he didn’t.  Instead, he said “Sure!  I can help you set one up if you want.”  So much for him being the bad guy.

So Princess Nagger skipped merrily into the house to fetch her laptop and seek our assistance for getting her all set up and ready to connect in safety mode with her friends and have as much fun as they’ve been having.  We didn’t hear from her for over an hour – we figured that in typical Princess Nagger style she had been distracted by something else.  Apparently not.  The intercom rang and I picked it up, and her sweet little voice said, “I got my Facebook page all set up, should I use one of my baby pictures for my profile picture?”  GAH!  Not only had she not followed the ‘rules’ for safety, she had her BFF help her via phone to get set up.  Revealing all her personal details.  Not cool.

I walked her through the steps to disable that account, and then I set up a new email account and Facebook page for her – making it ultra ultra private (or as ‘private’ as something like that can be when you’re talking about the interwebs).  I sent a friend Request to both me and my hubby, and one to each of her BFF’s.  Reluctantly doing so, I might add.  And the clincher?  She gave me a hug and said  “You’re the best mom, ever.  Thanks for setting up my Facebook page.  Face it, Mama – I am growing up, you know.”  Just stick a knife through my heart, willya?

Which brings me to this week’s question(s):

If your kids are not yet ‘Facebook Age’, will you let them have limited access when they get to be about 8 or 9, or do you think that’s too young?  Do you check out your kids Facebook pages (or will you when they’re old enough to have one) on a regular basis? (like I’ll be doing with PN – because dammit, 8 is too young!)

Have a great weekend!

 

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Happy Aloha Friday!

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From Kailani at An Island Life:
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41 Comments

  1. Ahhhh!! My daughter is 8, as far as I know she doesn’t know what FB is, yet… I will resist her having one as long as possible. Preferably till 13, maybe 20… Once she does have one, I will be monitoring it like crazy!!
    She has already started asking for a cell phone…. UGH!!!

    Love the title BTW!! LOL! Aloha Friday is back on my blog!!

  2. My oldest just turned 13, but does not want to join yet ! So hey the later the better for me . Def do not recc kids joining before the legal age. So….
    new foll on GFC ! Feel free to hop by my blog when you get a chance to 🙂

  3. 8 or 9 is too young in my opinion! All my grandchildren started their facebook when they were 12 years old. I thought that was young too. The internet is the wild, wild west still and there are so many predators out there!! It is scary! I don’t envy your position.
    Hugging you
    SueAnn

  4. Hi!

    Thanks so much for linking up with our Feed Me Friday hop. There are several wonderful blogs participating again this week, you’re certain to find a few new favorites!

    I look forward to reading more from you!

    Your Co-Host,
    Emily from Nap Time Is My Time

    P.S. – I’ve recently switched from blogger to WordPress and had some issues when transferring the GFC widget. I’d really appreciate if you could double check to ensure you’re following me and are subscribed to the correct newsletter subscription!

  5. Fortunately, I didn’t have to worry too much about this, as my youngest is 16. The kids all have Facebook accounts, and I am friends with all of them (a lot of older/adult kids refuse to “friend” their parents), but none of them spend a great deal of time on it – even Miss J, who is the most enthusiastic user out of the 5 of them. I think, though, that if I had younger children I would make sure they abide by the age requirements set forth by Facebook. I understand that peer pressure makes it difficult, and I really don’t blame you for letting PN have one; I think you absolutely did the right thing when you insisted she let YOU set up the account.

    Ah, the knife in the heart of them growing up. I remember it well.

  6. Ugh! Facebook—I mean I love it and all–or at least the folks who write status posts that amuse me! Hate it for my kids–the 11 year old is accepting of the age restriction, and the 14 year old has more fakes friends than I could’ve ever imagined! Sure I log on to his account (as I told him I heard parents do, so he’d know it’s not JUST ME), and what absolutely blows my mind is what some of the girls (mostly) are writing on there–do they not care what their parents read, or do their parents not check…um, because they should. My mom told me I invaded his privacy one day–she should’ve invaded mine way back when…seriously!

  7. Eh,hem … I am loving the blog name … and going with the theory that great minds must think alike!! LOL! Hope you stop by and visit our blog – Blenifer Uncorked @ http://www.blenifer.com

    I am a confessed hater of facebook … it’s addicting and I gave it up and for sake of blog promotion now that I’m in the BlogHer network I rejoined.

    now following from Friday’s blog hop! http://www.blenifer.com – hope you stop by and follow back!

  8. Ironically a friend and I were discussing bring up children today as compared to when we did, her son is getting married in 6 weeks. My sons are 27 and 25 so this question is hard for me to answer. My thoughts, however, from what I read and/or hear, I think 8 is quite young for FB.

  9. Michelle only likes it for the games so I have a pic of her & me for my profile picture. Then she feels like she is part of my Facebook and can play the games. So I guess you could say we share a Facebook page – and that is why I have I-Carly etc on my friends list.

  10. Fortunately my kids have not asked yet. My oldest is 9. But, since we homeschool I think we have avoided many of the tween pitfalls so far. Though I know it’s coming. For now, they have a shared desktop computer with Net Nanny. No phones or Facebook or email accounts for as long as we can hold them off 😉

    Good luck!

  11. Hi Stacy,
    I followed you from the Bee Friendly Friday hop. I’d love you to follow me back at http://gumdroppass.blogspot.com

    Oh, the facebook issue! I was a sophomore in college when it made its entrance into the world. Then it was only for college students. Never would I have thought that my entire family would end up having accounts, much less children! I think it’s like anything else on the internet: As long as parents monitor it, I see no real harm in it. But how cute (and maybe heartbraking!) – her telling you to “face” that she’s growing up.

  12. I always thought my kids will have to be around 16 before they have an fb account, but things can change.

    However certain ages are just too young and it is great if the parent is monitoring this all the time, but so many things can happen that little things like that fall by the way side. Don’t forget they can delete things before you get to see it.

    And for me, it doesn’t matter which child have what, it doesn’t mean my child need to have it. Plus it’s not about trusting our child, it’s the other children around them who doesn’t have the same parent involvement that we have to worry about.

    But it’s different for everyone and we know our kids better than anyone.

  13. Julie HAD one and was reported and shut down for being too young. I told her I would think about it again when she was 12 and not a moment before. I have 4 more months of peace and quiet. I guess. LOL

  14. I’ll let them have it. I’ll periodically check to make sure they’re not being stalked by a 50 year old man but I take a lot of liberties with my FB account and I want my kids to have the same creative liberties. They’ll do it anyway.

  15. My kids are 4 and 2. I’m sure by the time they’re older and can do FB, it’ll be something else new and cool and less private. I’m not sure, but I think nothing is private anymore!!!
    Perhaps the more stuff that’s shared, the less people will care and it’ll be like “reverse” privacy? Does that make any sense?
    I’m a follower now over on Google and I found you through Hop Along Friday blog hop!

  16. My oldest has facebook and I read it every now and then but my younger ones don’t. If my youngest son wants to play games he normally logs on mine or his dads to play them. He really isn’t into facebook.

  17. Nope, don’t have any kids at home. Only my grandson and he’s 12. 12 is a good age I think, and it depends on the child if they’re mature enough too. Have a great weekend!

  18. 8 does seem a bit young. But as long as the parents monitor their kids on the internet and accounts to watch out for creepers! I am so not there yet so i cant say for certainty if my 8 year old would have an account. Just do what you are comfortable with and set the rules prior, so there are no surprises for her! Good luck. Happy Friday!

  19. They haven’t reached the age yet, but I know it’s coming. Not sure how we’re going to handle it yet, but I will definitely be keeping an eye on it once they do.

  20. I will try to stop my boys from having a Facebook account until they are the age that it is allowed. We have already offered our almost 8 year old to set up a private blog for him to write and enjoy. As a former middle school teacher, the drama from FB and then IM (pre-Twitter) was insane. Some of the photos and things that kids had unprotected scared me. We actually had a detective that worked with Dateline NBC come in to show the kids how easy it is to get information from their accounts.
    Beth would like you to read ..Adventures with Wikki StixMy Profile

  21. I don’t have my kids but I have many little cousins. My only little cousin with a facebook is only allowed to use it for games. I think maybe junior high or definitely high school is the right age to start having an account.
    Becca would like you to read ..Fun Pet PostMy Profile

  22. Our oldest grandson has an account that goes through me. His parents didn’t want to monitor the email notifications so I do. I’d rather know what he’s up to then have him unsupervised.

  23. Uh oh, so I shouldn’t just be resting on the fact that my Facebook page gets the automatic updates and that’s about it? Yipes! 🙂

    My kids are too young for Facebook (or computers, really) right now, but I sure hope that I can hold off stuff like this as long as possible. I’m not looking forward to them growing up!

  24. Ugh, I can’t even imagine having a child old enough to WANT an FB page, let alone having to actually go through and set it up for them! LOL! But trust and believe I will be monitoring accounts like a hawk! 🙂

    Happy Friday!

  25. I set up a Facebook account for my son this Summer, he’s 13. The reason for setting it up was because our church’s youth group have a Facebook group that they created to communicate and interact with each other on different topics. But, though he would be using it for the youth group, there are still other things that go on on Facebook that I would rather he not take part in. I didn’t like the idea of him having a Facebook, but knew this day was coming. SO what I did after adding myself as one of his Facebook friends was post a “Disclaimer” lol.. “This Facebook page is monitored by me, Austin’s mother. Any inappropriate comments or posts will be immediately deleted and the individual leaving the post or comment will be blocked & deleted”.. I thought it was funny, but by the dropped jaw and wide eyes on my son’s face.. I don’t think he found it was as humorous as I did 🙂

    Thank you for stopping by my blog!
    http://www.mauimompreneur.com/

  26. My son is 22 and obsessed with fb. I was lucky with my daughter. She is 17 and just added it this year. She has maybe 40 or so friends and won’t add a picture. She uses it once a week if they make plans via pm’s or events. It gets too out of hand. Social media is killing our social skills I think. Lol!

  27. Well…our three are grown & actually our older daughter was one of the first during her undergrad years (2001) to get the fb connection going at her university and sorority…and then our younger daughter got fb connected and then our son…I was way, way behind to join up (2010)…since in my mind, fb was for college kids (not to mention how I am not computer savvy)! haha …even after my hubby’s aunt (for goodness sakes!) had joined a few years ago and asked if I was on fb, I was still not. But a little after I started my etsy shop and blog, I guess I was feeling much more computer/tech savvy, I reluctantly joined in. I didnt do much with it, but was excited to see that people from my past “found” me! Growing up moving every 2 years, I lost touch with so many, but here fb reconnected old friends and even family! But now I love that I am able to organize past art orders on my fb art page for others to view… I still basically use my personal page only to see the photos that our kids and other family have on their fb and to touch base with distant fam and friends for things like birthdays.

    Don’t know if I would agree to younger ones on it, unless it is very restricted with the time that they are on it… and when I was in the same room and can monitor their activity.

    Sorry to wordy! (Yikes! I tend to be wordy, as you can see on my posts!)

    Blessings & Aloha!
    Been out of the loop, but happy to be by and join in this week!

  28. Nothing like friends forcing the issue. We’re not there yet but I dread the days when my kids have friends backing them up on this stuff. I’m glad PN was happy with the locked down settings. Not sure when my kids will be allowed to have an online presence (besides my blog!) but when they do, I definitely will be checking in on them often.

  29. Hi Stacy,

    I’m a brand new blogger. Darned if I know what I’m doing yet! Trying to figure out these hops!

    Look forward to meeting you and many new blogger friends!

  30. My 9 year old knows what FB is only because she always sees me on it. She keeps asking for her own page but I’m saying NO for as long as I can. 🙂

  31. Tara has had a FB since she was about 10, she is “legal” now. She is not a huge FB user, she’s BIG on Twitter. I stalk them both! I am horrified by some of the things her FB friends post, and I wonder if their parents watch their page. I would be very concerned about my child if she were posting the types of things these kids post. When Tara’s friends find out their parents are “stalking” them, they shut the page down and start over until they find them again…..

    I’m moving to WordPress… I used my new URL. Still a work in process! I went to a workshop yesterday!

  32. I have not allowed my boys to have a fb account. They can play games on “mine” and I can monitor everything they do. they aren’t 13yet. We’ve already had a problem with my then 11yrold posting too much online. You’ve seen me, like PN I don’t use their names.

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