Politically Correct Holiday – Monday’s Music Moves Me

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!  We sure did – Princess Nagger said it was the best Christmas ever.  So there ya go.  Best ever.

Can you believe it’s the last week of 2010?  I don’t know about you, but it seems this year flew by at lightning speed.  Since it’s Monday, that means it’s time once again for Monday’s Moves Me!  The month of December was devoted to Christmas , and while Christmas is now passed, I couldn’t resist sharing one more funny one for you.  It’s ’s “”.  Seriously funny.  I couldn’t find an official video, but I found one someone made that’s pretty hilarious.   Enjoy!

Kung Pao Buckaroo Holiday Lyrics
Brad Paisley

And now the grand old opera theater proudly presents
a special holiday edition of the Adventures of the Kung Pao Buckaroos

Well, it’s a Kung Pao Buckaroo Holiday
Whatever you do watch what you say
If you’re easily offended well that’s okay
It’s a completely non-offensive and politically correct holiday

We catch up with our three cowboys one cold
December night huddled around the camp fire.

How ‘bout we sing some holiday songs?
Yeah, hey George, you wanna lead us off?
Yeah, I got one.

Oh Chri-biip-mas tree oh Chri-biip-mas tree how lovely are thy branches…

Why am I getting blipped again?
Haven’t you heard guys? You can’t say Chri-biip-mas you gotta say Holiday
I can’t say Chri-biip-mas?
No you might offend somebody.
Who is offended by Chri-biip-mas?
You know you might offend the biiiip and the biiiip and the atheists.
What?
Time to politically correct.

I’ll lead this off.

On the first day of Chri-biip-mas my true love sent to me…

Jimmy, are you listening?
What?
You can’t say Chri-biip-mas.
Why not?
You can say biiiip on the last record.
Why can’t I say Chri-biip-mas?
I didn’t make the rules.
Hey listen guys, it’s not that difficult,
all you gotta do is change Chri-biip-mas to Holiday.
You know, instead of saying white Chri-biip-mas, you say
I’m dreaming of a whi-biiip Holiday.
Why did I get blipped?
You’ve got to say Caucasian.
So I have to sing, I’m dreaming of a Caucasian holiday?
Sure, that won’t offend anybody.

Well, it’s a Kung Pao Buckaroo Holiday,
Whatever you do watch what you say
If you’re easily offended well that’s okay

Why do these people have to feel that way?
How come they get offended so easily?

It’s a completely non-offensive and politically correct holiday

I’m just trying to come up with a song here.
Let’s sing one together, everybody ready? George?
Ready.
Bill you ready?
I’m ready.
Jimmy? Jimmy? Jimmy?
Okay!

We three kings of biiiiiiiiip are bearing gifts we’ve traveled really far….

Sorry boys, you have to say Asia now.
What?
Oh, come on just try.
I’ve gotta get hyped up for this,

We three kings of Asia are….

That sounds like horse biiiip
Oh lord, okay. How ‘bout Little Drummer boy?
Nope, that offends short people.
And you can’t say drummer ‘cause that will offend real musicians.

How ‘bout little –hahaha- town of Bethlehem?
What’s this with all the short jokes?

Hey how ‘bout we do Silent Night?
No, ‘Cause it offends people hard of hearin’ and afraid of the dark.
What did he say about a shark?
SHARK?

This happens every year.

Well, it’s a Kung Pao Buckaroo Holiday,
Whatever you do watch what you say,
If you’re easily offended well that’s okay,
It’s a completely non-offensive and politically correct holiday.

Hohoho!
No.
I can’t say ho?
No you might offend some women.
So basically we can’t sing anything?

I think that a bunch of bull biiiip.
Softer George it’s more effective.
I think that a bunch of bull biiiip.
You now what? I don’t care who we offend,
I’m gonna sing Chri-biip-mas carols if I wanna sing Chri-biip-mas carols.
Louder Bill it’s more effective.
I don’t care who we offend,
I’m gonna sing Chri-biip-mas carols if I wanna sing Chri-biip-mas carols.
Me too.

We wish you a merry Chri-biip-mas, we wish you a merry Chri-biip-mas,
We wish you a merry Chri-biip-mas, and a happy ne-biip year.

You can’t say new; it’ll offend the old folks.
And you better not offend them.
Us.
Yeeaahhh

Hope y’all had a politically correct holiday…enjoy your Monday!  I’ll catch up with everyone later today as we’re switching back over to cable/internet/phone for a better deal than our current satellite/internet/phone 3-fer.  Yes, that means we’ll be waiting for the cable guy.  Might end up as interesting blog fodder, you never know!



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This entry was posted in Monday's Music Moves Me and tagged , , , , , by Stacy (the Random Cool Chick). Bookmark the permalink.

About Stacy (the Random Cool Chick)

After 20+ years in the Corporate World and years of infertility, Princess Nagger made her miraculous appearance and I chose to become a SAHM and WAHM - I love every minute of it. We added Little Dude through adoption, adding a whole new dimension to our family. We have an eclectic mix of pets: dogs, cats, birds and fish. I love to cook and try new techniques to turn ordinary into extraordinary. Crafty by nature, I take on a lot of unique projects and enjoy seeing the end result. My favorite, of course, is making my own wine out of fruits and grapes. Experiments with water currently underway. I blog about the joys of parenting, family, friends, life, love and anything else that strikes my fancy. I do enjoy doing reviews and giveaways for products I use, believe in and can stand behind.
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18 thoughts on “Politically Correct Holiday – Monday’s Music Moves Me

  1. LOL Where in the world did you find that? The title “Kung Pao Holiday” reminds me of the scene in A Christmas Story when they have to eat their Christmas dinner in the Chinese restaurant.

    Over the top political correctness is so silly! So true!

    One of the voices in the song reminds me of the voice Sheriff of Nottingham from Disney’s Robin Hood.

  2. I’m so glad PN had the best Christmas EVER. Until next year, of course.

    Which should be here a lot sooner than any of us anticipated…

  3. LOLOL Stacy!!! SUPER!!! Why have I not heard this before? LOL
    LOVE IT and gotta share it! I don’t care if Christmas is past! I gotta feeling that I know a lot of people who have not heard this!
    THANKS bunches!

    And I have left two others notes with Lorie & XmasDolly, but I got my darn link wrong again in the blog list! So…when ya’ll click it…you’re gonna get a page saying the link is broken! And as you know, someone has to remove it before I can re-enter! I think I may not be gifted for doing this! I feel like a total dummy!

  4. This is seriously funny for sure.
    I love the bleeping.
    Gosh this is so entertaining, I’ll have to download this myself.
    It’s just great!

  5. This is hilarious! I love it!

    Where do you find them!!

    I am glad you had a wonderful Christmas and the princess has stamped it approved 🙂

    Have a great week!

  6. I love it! Never heard it before, but it’s hysterical. Thanks for sharing. HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND A VERY HEALTHY AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOURS. Thanks for playing with us.

  7. Oh, Stacy, first – I’m glad you had the best Christmas EVER!!
    Second, that was the funniest thing! It reminds me of the time “Larry the Cable Guy” read the Night Before the Non-Denominational Winter Holiday (or something to that effect). I’m so tired of how everyone gets so “offended” by everything and these guys really makes you think about how ridiculous it has become.
    So, Merry Christmas to you and your family and a very happy, healthy new year to you all!

  8. When I read the words, I was like, “Huh?” Then I hit play, so much funnier. I don’t know who KPB is, but this one was funny. I just say Merry Christmas to everyone – who cares what other people think.