This is the Sixth segment of my ‘series posts’ catching everyone up on my Journey to my Miracle Baby. If you want to start at the beginning, feel free to go read them here:
Thank you all for your kind words, I appreciate the support!
This segment turned into something a little different than what I had originally planned…I did say that the Queen B story either needed its own post or a spot on Jerry Springer, so… since Jerry Springer wasn’t available, I went with a post instead. 🙂 It is important, however, for future segments, because it will give you a greater understanding for what transpires with the Queen B during my pregnancy.
Last segment you were introduced to the Queen B – the person who put herself in charge of everyone around her, and if you didn’t conform to her ways, you were on the receiving end of her wrath in various forms of retaliation. One of those forms being her ability to convince people that she knows all, sees all and is the only one who has the right answer for everything.
Mr. Right and I realized after a few years that she had tried to drive a wedge between he and I (successfully a few times, hence the previous short-lived break ups). We decided to maintain a united front, but at the time didn’t want to abandon his childhood friend (her fiancé). We figured he’d need some sort of moral support from his long-term friendship with Mr. Right.
Remember how Mr. Right’s childhood friend had approached him for the loan of $12,000.00 cash before the move out from the West Coast? It was needed to purchase Queen B’s late mother’s house from the estate. But we were wondering why it needed to be ‘purchased’ – why didn’t her late mother leave Queen B or one of her siblings the house in her will? Apparently it was outlined in Queen B’s late mother’s will that none of her offspring were to get the house – and stressed in particular that Queen B was not allowed to get the house, buy the house or live in the house. We never did find out why that was stipulated, but based on some of the antics Queen B had done and was capable of, we sort of figured out why her mother was so against her getting the house.
The cash Mr. Right loaned to his childhood friend served as the down payment to buy the house and property from the estate – it’s a little foggy in who’s name the house was purchased, it was either in the name of Queen B’s fiancé (Mr. Right’s childhood friend), or Queen B’s husband, or in both names. At any rate, they managed to work around the legalese of the will and Queen B secured the house and continued to live there. The original agreement about the $12,000.00 loan was to divide the 10-1/2 acres into 2-acre lots, so that Queen B’s 3 children would each have 2 acres, 2 acres would be signed over to Mr. Right and myself, and the remaining 2-1/2 acres would be the land where the house sat. In the beginning, that sounded like the perfect plan.
After Queen B’s meddling with Mr. Right and my relationship, we started rethinking wanting to be on the same property as what we referred to as ‘The Clan’. We like our privacy, and we knew that would be severely lacking even if we chose the furthest 2 acres from the house. Especially when Queen B was talking about putting in sidewalks between everyone’s future abodes so she could get a golf cart or something and stop by whenever she wanted to. She had quit her job many years before, so her days were spent sitting around smoking like a train and barking orders to everyone around her.
Her oldest son mostly stayed in his room playing hours upon hours of blood-and-guts video games (and still does). Her daughter was/is pretty much her caregiver, washing her hair on command, cutting her toenails, cooking, cleaning – pretty much doing all the grunt work as Queen B barked orders at her. Her youngest son was the only one who would occasionally stand up to her, and he paid the price dearly for that later.
Her youngest son’s girlfriend was fairly timid and quiet in those early days, she worked as a waitress with Queen B’s daughter and did an excellent job, as evidenced by her daily tips. Even though she was still a teenager at the time, she was very good with money – her parents had taught her well, and she had quite a little nest egg saved up. When she had a huge fight with her parents once, Queen B tried to get her to become emancipated, and of course offered to have her move in at the house (with her nest egg, of course). Luckily the girlfriend reconciled with her parents, so Queen B was unable to get her hands on that nest money…for now.
When she and Queen B’s son got married, they moved into the detached garage that had been converted into living quarters on the property. Queen B’s son did a great job on the conversion; he worked in construction and always excelled in doing great work. Of course Queen B charged them an exorbitant amount of rent, and over-charged them for utilities as well. Queen B’s daughter got married a couple of weeks after her brother did, and she and her new husband moved into the upstairs of the house – also being charged rent and utilities for their cramped living space. In addition to that, Queen B charged her oldest son rent for his bedroom, and her husband and fiancé also had to kick in a predetermined (by Queen B) sum of money for their ‘keep’ in the household, too.
Every Friday, when everyone got paid, Queen B would sit at the head of the dining room table and collect everyone’s share for their living expenses. The total amount she collected far exceeded the outgoing expenditures, the rest she pretty much kept for herself. Queen B’s son and DIL found out they were expecting about 6 months later, and the DIL was beginning to tire greatly of the demands Queen B had on the two of them – they’d barely get home from work when their phone would be ringing…it would be Queen B ‘summoning’ them the 22 steps to the house. Usually it was for inane things, like to have them take Queen B’s dogs out, or fix dinner, or collect their mail. But mostly it was so Queen B could find out how much tip money her DIL made that day so she could figure out how much she could ultimately raise their living expenses.
After the baby was born, Queen B’s DIL really started getting annoyed by Queen B’s antics – she’d be at home with the newborn, and when her hubby came home from work, Queen B would summon him to the house to help with something…and keep him there for hours. The DIL understandably got tired of the shenanigans, and convinced her husband they needed to move off the property into their own place.
Queen B was not happy about this change in venue, since now she had to ‘make do’ with less income from her son and DIL. She would still end up summoning her son to come help her with something, and since they lived only 5 miles away, it was still convenient for Queen B to do so. So they found a different house further away. Amazingly enough, their living expenses were considerably less and they had 4 times the space. The DIL found a different job working at a care center for disabled patients, which increased her desire to ultimately become a nurse.
They saved up enough money to buy a wonderful house – they needed to have more room since they were expecting baby #2. The DIL was doing great at her job, and was making plans to go to nursing school to have the career of her dreams. After the second child was born, she went back to work immediately, but when they had enough saved up to comfortably live on one income, she decided to become a SAHM until both kids were in school. She planned on going back to school at that time to get a nursing degree and get an even better job later down the road.
Things were going as planned, until they decided to open their house to Queen B’s 40-something brother, his wife and their two kids, because the uncle and his wife had gotten themselves in trouble financially and were filing bankruptcy. Queen B’s son and DIL offered to let the family of 4 stay with them for a few months so they could get back on their feet and get back on track.
Since it was only going to be for a few months, they generously offered to let them stay there free, since the other option was to move in with Queen B for the short term. She, of course, planned on charging them rent/utilities if they moved in with her for a few months, so moving in with the son and DIL made more sense because there was more room, and they could save easier to get back on their feet quicker.
‘A few months’ quickly turned into six months…Queen B’s son and DIL sat down and had a long talk with the uncle and his wife, to try to help them figure out what their next steps would be. Queen B’s son had even found some great affordable rental houses through his connections with the people he worked with that his uncle and his wife could afford. Queen B’s son and DIL were getting concerned by the fact that their monthly expenses had tripled since the uncle’s family had moved in – electricity, groceries, gas, etc. They were disappointed to find out that the uncle and his wife had saved absolutely nothing during that 6 months. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
No idea where all their money was going – they were technically debt free since they had filed bankruptcy successfully and had their trailer repossessed. They should have had plenty of money saved up, particularly since the uncle’s job was a good one, with good pay, and his wife was getting a substantial amount in child support from her ex for the eldest child. Queen B’s son and DIL decided they needed to set some boundaries – and ask that the uncle and his wife help chip in at least on the groceries to alleviate some of the added financial burden. They agreed that they would alternate buying groceries, each being responsible every-other-week. It never happened.
It finally came to a point that the DIL needed to go back to work to help alleviate some of the extra costs – she went back to her waitress job so she could work at night when her hubby was home from work so they wouldn’t have to pay to have the kids in daycare. And still the Uncle and his wife didn’t offer to help out with anything…their kids were slowly destroying the house (holes in walls, broken tiles in the bathroom, broken doors and windows, etc.).
The Uncle was still working full time, but his wife refused to find a job – instead she’d either sequester herself in the bedroom while her kids ran amok, or would spend the day whiling away the time at Queen B’s house. During those times the care of all the kids fell on the DIL’s shoulders. Queen B’s son and DIL finally had had enough – after 11 months of the uncle and his wife living with them, and several sit-down discussions about their progress for getting back on their feet, they told them they had a month to find a new place to live. They wanted their house back.
All hell broke loose then – the uncle was mad that they were getting ‘kicked out’, never mind the original ‘plan’ and offer was just for a few months. Queen B was not happy. She disowned her son. Over the phone. Because he was an ungrateful child and was a horrible person for asking her adult brother – his uncle – to move out. It was unbelievable.
Mr. Right and I had gotten to be very good friends with the DIL and son, so we supported their decision to get their house back, and were there as ‘witnesses’ when they decided to call the Sheriff’s office to escort them when they were moving their things out – because they started taking some of the son and DIL’s personal belongings as well. We were flabbergasted that Queen B would disown her son over something like that – after her brother took advantage of her son for so long and caused them financial stress. After Queen B disowned her own son, we were finally 100% done with her. But there was still the matter of the $12,000.00.
The status of the acreage-in-exchange-for-the-loan had changed over the years – originally it was that Queen B would have the property formally sub-divided, we would get a deed to 2 acres, and it would be ours to do with what we wanted. We could build a house on it, we could sell it – it would be ours free and clear.
Then Queen B changed the ‘rules’ and mandated that it would be a 99 year lease instead, that we would not be allowed to ‘will’ it to anyone, if either or both of us would die before that 99 years, or decide to move away, it would revert back to her and her kids. Those terms were unacceptable to us, of course.
Then we found out at some point that the township would not allow that property to be sub-divided at all, so it turned out to be a moot point, and we were back to the Promissory note for future repayment instead. They planned on refinancing the mortgage and paying Mr. Right back in full at that time, about a year or so after the original mortgage. The ‘year’ turned into two, then several more.
Since they had never written up any kind of promissory note as they promised over the years, Mr. Right finally decided to do it himself – he had it Notarized, and wrote a very detailed letter to his former childhood friend, and had it delivered by Registered Mail. He offered a payment plan of a measly $100.00 per month, no interest – but if the Promissory note was ever defaulted on, the former friend would be subject to the entire amount due immediately, plus interest. Mr. Right’s former friend signed and Notarized the Promissory note and returned it. It was official. We would no longer be subjected to Queen B’s antics and meddling, and Mr. Right would finally, eventually, get his money back.
The future segments will have some references back to this post (or certain people in this post) during my Journey to my Miracle Baby, since cutting off Queen B from meddling in our lives didn’t happen until the Princess Nagger was about 8 months old. So now at least when I make references, you’ll be able to easily make the connections… 😉 Join me next week when the Journey continues…Resident Advisor Woes (breaking up underage drinking party fun) and the Surprise Pregnancy. 🙂
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