Dear Mother Nature,
We’ve been wanting to get some snow here, but you have not yet delivered. We’ve been patient, we accepted the fact that we wouldn’t get a White Christmas in spite of all our wishing and hoping. We were kept on the edge of our seats as our weather forecasters predicted not just one, but four different blizzards over the course of the last few months. But you still didn’t deliver. You have been taunting us.
This morning I woke up and saw that you are yet again taunting us. Sending us maybe an inch is not acceptable. Come on, can’t you do better than that? It’s not enough to warrant a snow day, not enough for the Princess Nagger to make snow angels, not even enough for a ‘Modified Kindergarten’ schedule (which I’m actually secretly happy about, she’s only gone 3 hours as it is, to take away an hour would have been detrimental to my bi-monthly grocery shopping that happens today). But I digress.
Your whole whopping one inch of snow only taunts us further. You have the ability to send us more, but you keep making promises that you don’t keep (i.e., the ‘blizzards’ we were supposed to get that never even formulated and we got nary a flake), then when we aren’t expecting to get anything (I don’t expect any precipitation when it’s less than 100% predicted…especially when you haven’t been able to ‘deliver’ when it’s been a 90% prediction!) you decide to toss a little snow our way to show us that you can, and only serves as an inconvenience for scheduled activities for the day. Thanks.
I respectfully request that you reorganize your distributors so you can send decent snow to those that are hoping for it, and give a break to those that are already tired of it. It’s a simple request, really, and I’m sure that your little Snow Elves can figure something out.
Thank you in advance for your cooperation.